D.C. Dudes

When you go to school with the children of Diplomats, when you almost run over a Secret Service Agent walking his Senator while you are riding your bike, when you go to church with Hillary Clinton's personal assistant and Mitt Romney's biggest campaign contributor and when you live 500 yards away from CIA headquarters you might be a little more aware of world events and politics than most kids. Raising a family here is a little different than the way I grew up. In some ways it is fantastic and sometimes not so much.  Let me give you some examples. 

Atley recently decided to make a list of what he would do if he were president of the United States.

 

1. Lower Taxes by $4989

2. Make more taxes go to the poor people, like my family.

3. Make my friends and family's birthdays national holidays.

4. Make the Japanese Maple the National Bush.

 

When I asked him how he planned on getting elected he said,  "I am going to rent a plane and distribute fliers all over the country and I am going to use a really persuasive font."

 

While that seems harmless, the other day I walked in to an all out war going on in my kitchen.

The boys informed me they were dressed up like the allied forces and there mission was to destroy this person.

This picture was taped to the window.  At first I was a little scared that they were shooting at me, what with the caption and all, but then I noticed the flag and realized that they were dethroning non-other than Kim Jung Sun, the North Korean Dictator. 

 

Life in an Instant

While on hold with the kid's pediatrician this afternoon I started thumbing through the pictures on my phone.  I have collected about a million, okay maybe a thousand pictures of really poor quality there. A few made the cut to Instagram but most are just my own little memories. I thought I would share a few I collected throughout the past month. 

Getting her hair trimmed! 

Date night! 

A visit to Atley's favorite restaurant, Cheesecake Factory, for finally getting 10 positive behavior points from his teacher. 

A date to Alden Theatre to see Raggedy Ann & Andy, the musical. 

Allergies so bad, you have to sleep with a roll of toilet paper. 

Scott's trip to NYC and Madison Square Garden to see the Cougars play in the NIT Final Four. 

Lots of costumes and scooter riding. 

A surprise visit to Nash's cafeteria with McDonald's! 

Waiting for a plane. I have three of the best Air-Travelers around. 

Getting the pool ready. 

And apparently I fell asleep in the hammock at some point. 

Out of Touch

Awhile back it was CRAZY HAIR DAY at Atley's school.  I totally dropped the ball on the whole thing.  I had planned on buying some colored hairspray but I honestly just forgot about it.  Atley remembered at bedtime the night before.  He was adamant that he participate in this most special event.  What to do? His hair is only a quarter of an inch long, not a lot of a material to work with.  Ah! Ha! I would dye his hair with Kool Aid. We had red Kool Aid in the pantry and I commenced dyeing.  I wrapped it in tin foil and let it sit for an hour or so. I was so excited to remove it and discover the masterpiece beneath, but when I removed the tin foil hat there was absolutely no change to his hair just some streaky red Kool Aid stains running down his forehead.  UGH!!  I was in the middle of telling him that there was nothing we could do when Scott came home and suggested we bleach his hair with Hydrogen Peroxide.  Okay, whatever! I was willing to try anything to get him to go to sleep for the night.  After two hours of adding more and more peroxide and creating more tin foil hats there was still no change to his hair.

 I told him I could give him a Mohawk but he didn't want that. He finally went to bed in tears.  The next morning he seemed in an unusually chipper mood for someone who wasn't going to participate in CRAZY HAIR DAY.  It was a cold rainy morning and I took him to the bus stop in the van. While we sat in our warm car he pulled the visor down and flipped open the mirror.  He then preceded to pull one of the previous night's tin foil hats out of his backpack and started mashing it on his head. "What are you doing?" I asked.  "You can't wear that. It isn't crazy hat day. It is crazy hair day."  He replied with, "Mom, I have no choice I have to do this. Everyone would think I had no school spirit if I didn't."  My response, "Yeah, but people will laugh at you if you show up wearing foil on your head."  He didn't agree and there was no convincing him otherwise.  We watched as the other kids arrived at the bus stop with their intricately designed crazy hair.  How could I possibly convince him to take the foil off of his head.  I came to the conclusion that this was going to have to be a social lesson he learned for himself.  The bus arrived and he got out of the car.  I was so nervous to see the other kid's reaction to his tin foil monstrosity. Imagine my surprise when they started clapping and cheering for him.  Another parent actually yelled at me, "Great job, Mom!"  What the heck?  He looked like a total dork!  What were they thinking. 

Eight hours later I picked him up at the same bus stop. He hopped off the bus with the foil helmet still sitting snugly on his head and a huge smile on his face. He had had a fantastic day. Everyone loved his crazy hair. It was then that I realized I was completely out of touch with what was cool and socially acceptable. In fact I think I might be the dork in the family.